I was reminded yesterday morning about why Judy and I have
started Smile Again Ministry. A man was calling and asking about
open dates for Whitetail Lodge. During the course of our
conversation he asked me, “How long has it been since your daughter
died?”

It was one of those L-O-N-G pause moments for me. It’s one of those
moments that parents who have had a child die really can’t prepare
for. “Mickey died 21 years ago today,” I told the caller. Now it was
his turn to pause.

Moms and dads who have had a child die live with the reality that at
any given moment someone, or something, will bring memories of their
child’s death rushing back like an emotional Tsunami.

It seemed impossible to believe that 21 years have passed since Mickey
died in the ICU unit at what is now known as Regional Hospital in St. Paul,
MN.

I can still remember those final moments. Mickey had been in a coma for
38 days. Her bed was surrounded by machines that monitored her pulse,
her blood pressure, her temperature, her oxygen levels. Another machine
pumped air in and out of her chest for her. Then the alarms on the
monitors began to sound. One by one they were turned off by the
nurses who had taken such incredible care of Mickey while she was alive.

Within seconds the only sounds that were heard in that room were the
agonizing tears of Judy and me. Even nurses were wiping tears from
their cheeks. Mickey had been a special patient for them as well. She
just had that affect on people.

Judy and I started Smile Again Ministries because we know every day
other moms and dads experience this same moment in their lives. We
want to be there to help them when the silence turns to the sounds of
“life as usual,” knowing that their lives will NEVER be “usual” again.

Even after 21 years Judy and I miss Mickey so much. We find ourselves
wondering what she would be like now? Would she be married? Probably.
Would she have children? Probably. Would she be reaching out to people
around her with her infectious compassion and laughter. No doubt. We
miss Mickey a lot.

By the way, the man I was talking to yesterday, he’s helping a mom and
dad come to Whitetail Lodge within the next month. Judy and I look
forward to weeping with them as they tell us the story of their son
who died this past summer.

God bless  - and remember, we love you guys. Pat & Judy

Last Saturday, Oct. 3, marked a monumental moment in Smile Again
Ministries history.

Judy and I were excited to see over 100 people come to see our
ribbon cutting ceremony and Open House for White Tail Lodge which
officially opened this week.

It was a bittersweet moment for Judy and me. Naturally, it was sweet
to see a dream that had moved to a vision and finally to reality. White
Tail Lodge marks a turning point from simply talking about helping people
to actually having people come to our retreat center for counseling and
support.

It was a bit bitter in that Saturday marked a day after what would have
been our Mickey’s 34th  birthday. So there were certainly emotions
circling our hearts and minds as we welcomed our friends and guests.

Below are pictures of our open house and some of the people who came to
see White Tail Lodge. Check them out.

This is a picture of one of our bedrooms that we’ve named Black Bear Den.

Trae Schmidt, one of Pat and Judy’s grandchildren, cut the ribbon that opened White
Tail Lodge.

After we had our ribbon cutting we had people release balloons in honor of loved
ones we remembered at the Open House.

Bobby Vry, one of our many volunteer workers, sat around our fire ring during the Open House.

This is a picture of the living room area of White Tail Lodge. In the background you can
see the kitchen area.

Several people loved looking at the dining area and the enclosed play room.

The Peace Garden was a focal point of people looking from some real peace and quiet.
Fall colors are quickly replacing the vibrant colors of flowers in full bloom.

Greetings from a totally exhausted Pat & Judy. We can finally see
the light at the end of the tunnel. Along with our volunteers (see
pics at the end of this blog), we’ve finally been able to finish putting
all the poly on the walls, and painting the walls.

This week we’re finishing the hard wood floors. Had to sand about
2000 square feet and am now applying the finish. We have two
coats down, and just one to go. We have to get the floors done
because most of our furniture is being delivered this Saturday. It’s
so exciting to finally be at that point.

We will definitely be opening on October 5. We are planning an Open
House on Saturday, October 3 from noon until 5:00 pm. We’d love
to have you come and see what White Tail Lodge looks like. We’ll
have MANY more details about the Open House in the days ahead.

It almost seems surreal to realize that our dream, two years in the
making, is finally coming to fruition. We’ve had several calls already
about when we’ll be opening. We are looking forward to helping moms
and dads and surviving siblings deal with the death of their child. If
you know of anyone who could benefit from coming to White Tail Lodge
for extended counseling please tell them about Smile Again Ministries.
But don’t stop there, help them make that first call. Our number
is 320-310-8877.  Or they can contact us by emailing us at
pat@smileagainministries.com  .

Please take a few moments to look at the pics of some of our many
volunteers that are making White Tail Lodge a reality. Remember,
if the picture doesn’t come up in full size just click on the picture
and it will come up full size.

Thanks for taking the time to read our blog and do help us get the
word out now about our opening. Remember, we love you guys. Pat
& Judy

Gary Juneski applies paint to the wall in the hallway leading to
our bedroom suites. Gary has put in many, MANY volunteer hours.
We appreciate all he’s done.

Deb Sherman applies finish to one of the doors in the bathroom of
one of our bedroom suites.

Scottie Sherman, Deb’s husband, get ready to paint a wall. Scottie and
Deb have volunteered many, many hours to help us get White Tail Lodge
open.

Deb Steele, one of SAM’s Board of Directors, has been amazing at helping
get the word out about SAM. Even though she’s in terrible pain from an
advanced case of Lyme’s disease, she still keeps moving along. Deb, and her
husband John, have been helping in the remodel. You can read about the death
of their son, Johnny, on our website.

We have so many beautiful flowers in our Peace Garden and around
White Tail Lodge. Look below for more pics of flowers.

Sorry it’s been so long since I’ve blogged. We’ve been busy with the
remodel and now I’ve come down with some bug transmitted by ticks
that makes you feel - well, like you’ve been driven over by a convoy of
trucks.

But as I recover I did manage to sneak outside (when Judy was on the
phone) and sit by the waterfall in the Peace Garden. While there today I
noticed “Henry” sitting in the water. Henry is the name I had given a very
large frog that has taken up residence in the waterfall’s pool. My grandson,
Trae, was actually the first to notice Henry a few weeks ago.

Since then I’ve seen “him” from time to time. But today, as I watched
Henry I noticed other things swimming in the water. As I took a closer
look, I realized what I was looking at were tadpoles. Little “Henry’s.”
Which apparently means that Henry is really Henrietta! As far as I could
tell, we can expect to see at least five new frogs in the coming weeks.
That a way Henrietta! You can see three of the kids below.

If you look close, you can see the tadpoles floating in the water of our pool.

One of the other fantastic things happening at SAM is the blooming of the
flowers in the Peace Garden. Check out the pictures of just some of the
flowers we get to see as we stroll through the Peace Garden.

Thanks for checking out our blog. Remember, we love you guys! Pat & Judy

Well, Gene and Bobby pulled out yesterday afternoon marking the
end of the major construction portion of the remodel of White
Tail Lodge. Judy and I can’t say thanks enough to Gene and Bobby
for 26 VERY full days of work here. As you’ve seen, they were joined
by other volunteers during that time too. But Gene and Bobby worked,
and worked, and worked. By the way, Gene is now free to do other
construction work. If you need someone to build a house, or just
remodel the one you have, I’d recommend Gene without reservation.
He does quality work, and he works hard. You can contact Gene by
calling 218-639-3743 if you’d like him to bid on a job for you.

Now we’re in the staining and finishing of the woodwork. And there is a
LOT of woodwork to be finished. There are walls, ceilings, and yes - the
beautiful hard wood floors.

For the past two days we’ve had Harvey and Janelle Springer from the
Omaha, NE area here. They’ve been applying a lot of sander sealer and
polyurethane, and stain. Harvey’s 71 and Janelle is keeping her age a
secret. But they are working at light-speed. You can see their pics below.

We’ve also enjoyed having one of our SAM board members here with
Harvey and Janelle. Dr. Marilyn Weldin is helping us brain-storm on ideas
for grant-writing, furnishing the kid’s play area, and a wealth of other
knowledge. Dr. Weldin was a professor that Judy and I had while attending
college. She is such an encourager to us.

Sorry, I still haven’t gotten out to the beaver’s den to get that picture
I promised you of one of our log steps being used as siding on their den.
But I’ll try to get that done over the weekend.

Judy and I want to thank everyone for your continued financial support
and encouragement. Remember, we love you guys. Pat & Judy

Janelle Springer does some touch up work on the stain she applied to one of the
doors leading into the children’s enclosed play area.

Harvey Springer works on applying sanding sealer to walls near the doorway
to our patio area.

It’s been confirmed - the beavers are siding their home with some
mighty fine “former steps leading to our beach,” logs. Judy and I were
out on the lake last night and I happened to look over at the beaver den
and Judy said, “Is that one of our logs?” Sure enough! One of our six
steps is now siding on the beaver den closest to our waterfront. I was
going to take pictures tonight and send out, but it’s raining here. I’ll
have to wait for another day.

Gene White and Bobby Vry continue to do the finish work on the bedroom
areas of White Tail Lodge (see pics below). Things are looking absolutely
beautiful. We have some volunteers coming in tomorrow (Tues) to help
begin the sealing of the siding in the lower level and possibly the deck area
if it’s not raining.

Hopefully you’ve received an email and/or post card about this Sunday’s
fund raiser at the Blackberry Golf Club in Sartell, MN. The fund
raiser begins at 4:00pm and runs until 7:00pm. Judy and I will be talking
about SAM at 4:30, 5:30, and 6:30. If you haven’t heard, there are LOTS
of items for our silent auction. Items include everything from a week at
Branson, MI or a week in the Cayman Islands, haircuts, tools, and art
pieces. So don’t miss out. Come to the fund raiser.

Well, that’s it for now. Check out the pics below. Remember you can
left click your mouse inside a picture and it will appear full size. God
bless - we love you guys. Pat & Judy

Gene White (closest) and Bobby Vry work on putting in the railing for the
stairs leading to one of the loft areas.

SAM has had a great day! This morning we had a local newspaper
publish a story about SAM. You can read the article for yourself
by going to  http://www.northlandpress.com/CLsmileagain71409.html

It was exciting when someone from New Jersey called even before
I had a chance to read the article myself to talk to me about SAM.

Judy and I also had the opportunity to speak to a local ROTARY
Club at noon. We were able to share about our mission, and
answer several questions that people had.

The remodel is moving along well. We had extra helpers here
today from the Verndale Alliance Church. We have just a little
flooring left to lay, and then it’s just the final finishing work.
Once the woodwork is done, we will begin finishing all the
woodwork with stains and polyurethane.

Remember, we have a benefit fund raiser in Sartell, MN on
Sunday, July 26 at the Blackberry Ridge Golf Club between
4:00 and 7:00 pm.  We’ll be having a quilt raffle as well as
a silent auction for a one week vacation to Branson. You
can get directions to the golf club by going to
www.blackberryridgegolf.com

That’s it for today. Thanks for reading our blog. Remember,
Judy and I love you guys. Pat & Judy